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“seidi haarla is doing SO much heavy lifting here that i kind of want to lie down after watching. this is postpartum dread in the cold wet finnish woods and she plays the whole thing like her body is being colonized in real time, which honestly it is. the robot lawnmower creeping around the yard was funnier and more unsettling than it has any right to be and i clocked it every time it appeared. yeah it hits some folk horror beats you've seen before and that baby SHRIEKS until your teeth hurt, but the isolation gets under you early and never really lets go. rupert grint being genuinely good and then barely being in it is a crime, give the man screen time. left it feeling clammy and vaguely nauseous which i think is the point”

“sophie thatcher lit in that pink and purple neon while everyone speaks 'wolf' at each other... i know it's barely a movie but i'd live in it”

“went in fully ready to hate this the way i hated every other blood-and-honey public domain cash grab and instead i sat there like ...oh no it kind of rules? the pinocchio animatronic actually looks like it could give you splinters, a real physical splintery thing lurching around instead of the usual weightless cg mush, and i can't stress how much that matters to me. robert englund voicing the cricket is having the time of his life and richard brake going full unhinged is exactly the casting you dream about for something this stupid. it's cheap and the dialogue clunks and it's never once actually scary, don't come for the fear, come for the nasty little practical kills. the ending goes softer than everything before it deserved but honestly i'll take a public domain slasher that clearly gave a damn over one that didn't every single time”

“paused it a bunch just to sit with those opening credits, all the fake in-universe merch and the nightswimming cover playing over it, i wasn't ready. gillian anderson doing the victory rolls and being catty at hannah einbinder is doing something to me i will not be unpacking here. i went in bracing for the schoenbrun thing where it's all vibe and no pulse and instead it's horny and funny and mean and the candy is EVERYWHERE like it's part of the walls. one of those movies i know is built beautifully but also feel a little insane admitting how much fun i had. saw it in a half full theater and the guy behind me kept laughing at the wrong parts and honestly i get it, this thing keeps yanking you between scared and turned on so fast you don't know where to put your face”

“the part of this that actually got under my skin is that stretch before anyone understands what's happening, when it's just a plane and one old guy stumbling out of the lavatory and everyone doing that thing where they pretend not to see. that's the whole nightmare fuel right there, being trapped in economy with your seatbelt on while something goes wrong two rows up. once it commits to the bigger idea it gets louder and a little less scary, and yeah i've seen every piece of this movie somewhere before, twilight zone, the mist, the whole airplane-paranoia canon. but quale keeps that cabin so tight and airless that i still felt my shoulders creeping up to my ears for most of it. honestly i'd have watched another hour of them just being scared and confused, the confusion was better than the answers”